The meaning

I'm trying to remember why I walked away in the first place, but my memories seem blurred out by my feelings.  I hate this.  I can't think straight.  All I keep re-living in my mind is that nothing is going to be the same.  I was up in space back then.  Now I'm being held by this insane abyss, not knowing what to say, write.  Not knowing how to keep alive a simple conversation.  I want to run away, literally.  Just leave my cellphone and computer behind, and run. 

I'm not sorry for what I did, said or thought.  That's me, this is me.  I don't belong to anybody, to any place, to any belief.  I belong to me.  Maybe I seem to be stuck, but I'm really not.  I travel all the time, deep inside my mind, I go places. 

Yes, I'm a daydreamer.  And my mistake was to give those dreams permission to capture me, and when I finally got loose, I got caught in a never-ending tornado of emotions.  I don't have patience now, but I'm always calmed. 

Now I'm in between reality and fiction, I don't know which vocabulary or tone to use.  I don't want to sound overconfident nor with a low self esteem.  But, what do I do when I'm right in the middle?  Is it normal?  It has to be normal, right? 


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